stuck in Mobile, with those german blues?

I have been trying to for the last couple of weeks to write about what is happening here in Mobile, but it has been difficult to express my feelings without fear of recourse.

I was actually questioned about my blogs, like the HR department of this company forgot that there is the first amendment in the country, which allows me to speak whatever is on my mind as long as I am not slandering anyone. So, if you are reading this blog, please remember that it is my right as a citizen of the United States of America to be able to freely express my speech and it is protected by the laws under which we all operate in this country.

I quit my job in Seattle to pursue an opportunity here that seemed to be the perfect fit. It is now painfully apparent that this is not the correct fit and that my intuition, which is rarely incorrect, was in fact, incorrect.

The situation now leaves me in quite the peril as I wait to see what the final soloution is to this problem which has occurred. My destiny for right now is out of my hands as I await to hear word from my company about just how they plan to proceed with my employment.

Let me state in all of this vagueness that I did not do anything wrong or out of term, but the contract from which we had working with this other company has been called into question, which leaves me in the middle of a political situation which I have not experienced.

The main issue is what should happen, what is just and what is realisitic in a situation like this? It has come to pass that my services are not needed, which would be acceptable if I had taken this position in Seattle. However, I moved across the country, almost as far as you could move in the United States, only to find that two weeks after working hard that a mistake had been made, but not my mistake.

This situation begins to tear at the very fabric of what I think is wrong with people and with this country. We, as a society have got to stop thinking about what is the minimum we can do and instead think about what is just in any given situation. This scenerio right now is particularly difficult as my wedding is in five short weeks and it seems that I am without a position to help pay for this wedding. I have not been released from my work as my employer wants to keep me working as he sees the value of service that I bring, but nothing has come of it yet. I am now very concerned about the future and am forced to begin making decisions which I didn't wish to have to make.

The questions from which I am faced to consider are endless. There are three possible scenerios here, all of which I am apprehensive to consider. Most of my concern lies directly with the costs associated with moving and setting up a house at this point. The most viable option at this point is to move to Germany, get married, process Lili's visa and see where we are at that time. The problem with that is what to do with my things, such as my car, my new townhouse and all of my furnishings? I can't really just leave them here. What about my car? Shipping it to Germany isn't the most realistic possibility right now. I owe more on it than its worth, which is typically for an amazing amount of people in this country.

All it really takes is one minor shuffle in our lives that we aren't prepared for and you realize that all you have worked for can be gone in an instant.

This is all I have to say about this for right now. I will know more in the coming days as I continue to try to drive this problem to a resolve.